Archive for the 'Job Humor' Category
If it’s your first job and first day at work, it can be a very frightening experience. It’s because you are having your life’s first experience of stepping in practical life and you really don’t know what to expect. Here are few things to expect on your first day at a new job.

Introduction to Employees
Of course when you will start newly, you will be working with employees first. At first you will meet your supervisor at the work place then you will be taken around to introduce you to the rest of the employees. If you got the job in a big company with lot of employees then it’s possible that you won’t remember the names of all employees. But its OK with passage of time you will be able to pick them up. But never forget names of your managers.
Tour
After the introduction with co-workers most likely you will be taken to a tour of your working area. They will show you the place where you will work and also the show you around. Try best to remember your way around work. If you got job in a big office building then most probably you will get lost when you first start. But after some time you will know the office premises very well.
Paperwork
After meeting co-workers and looking work place premises you will have to fill out some paperwork. Paperwork will be involved with every new job you will start. Most of time you will have to fill out a W-4 form for tax purposes. From your form, employer will know that how much money to deduct of your paycheck for federal taxes and state taxes. That time when you will hand over the W-4 form to your employer, most probably employer will give you an employee handbook or something that spells out the rules of your employment.
Responsibilities
When you will go through all of these steps, then your manager most probably will tell you the basics of what you will be doing. You will be taken to working area and will be shown some of the steps that will be involved in your job. Don’t be panic if you can’t understand all of them on the first day. Try to remember as much as you can and do not be discouraged if you forget a few things. There is nothing to worry because later you can ask your co-workers or the manager for some help if you forget something. When your manager will be guiding you about your work , make a small attempt to work, this will make a good impression on your manager. They will feel comfortable leaving you to do your job in the future.
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Telemarketing is a very challenging job and involves constant rejection. So never get frustrated if you won’t achieve your goal. Keep one thing in mind that never take rejection personally. Telemarketing skills are necessary to be a good telemarketer.

You need a positive attitude while calling prospects. Your enthusiasm and confidence will com across in your voice and you will attract the new prospects, on other hand if you are boring and negative then you will be failed in attracting new prospects. Excitement sells and enthusiasm contagious. So turn the negative statements give by the prospect into negative ones.
Make it sure that you are prepared well. When you are going to call the prospect, preparation plays a vital role in your dealing because then you will know exactly what you are going to say when you call and your conversation then will flow more smoothly and will be more effective.
Other essential thing in preparation process is organization. This will help you to organize your leads so that you know who you will call next and a time. Having thorough knowledge about your product or service will help you to answer any question the prospect may ask.
Mirroring and matching the prospect is also a great telemarketing skill. For doing this ask the prospect a question and pay close attention to the response. If the tone is louder and the answer is short phrases then speak louder and keep your sentences short and you will establish rapport. Often people do business with someone who they observe same like them. You can also build a rapport by listening and repeating the words your prospect uses (positive ones) and keeping your rhythm and rate of speech same as theirs.
Asking qualifying questions is also an important telemarketing skill which you must consider and develop. Usually qualifying questions are used to separate those prospects that fall on particular criteria and will more likely say yes to an offer. This skill saves your time by avoiding unqualified prospects. Listening actively and carefully allow you to recognize many buying signals and understanding the prospects’ needs and concerns.
The last essential telemarketing skill is that whenever you ask a question or make a comment that is intended to get the prospect to respond-pause. Perfect use of strategic pausing creates effects, emphasis and enables the prospect to think before making final decision. Strategic pause is essential because without it you run the risk of talking yourself out of the sale.
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A career which looks best today,might not be the best choice in next few years. There are various factors that affect your employ-ability; many from them are linked with job market. You can manage your career for long term success by keeping an eye on the trends in the marketplace and responding to changing factors.

There are three types of trends which you must know for moving forward. Those are:
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Employment Trends
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Recruiting Trends
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Market Trends
1 – Employment Trends
To know about the employment trends there is Occupational Outlook Handbook, which is compiled by the Bureau of Labor Statistics , it have hundreds of career profiles including job outlook, earnings, and required training. You can search on OOH by keywords and it have internal links related to occupations that you may not have considered.
OOH also contains list of resources for job-related information at the state level, you can find here.
For assessing a particular career path which you think is fit for your goals, you can know about it in Projection Data Section that shows projected job growth through 2018 on OOH. You will find that different fields are having different prospects and if your field is projecting to a negative growth then moving to a field that’s projecting strong growth can give you a long term advantage.
2 – Recruiting Trends
If you are only concentrating to reach potential employers by applying online then you are missing great opportunities. Because recruiters are increasingly using blogs, Twitter, Facebook and other online avenues to connect with candidates.
Your ability of changing from one field to another is directly connected with your ability to connect effectively with the decision maker who will hire you. That’s why it’s necessary you choose such job where you can be visible and have more chances to be hired.
3 – Market Trends
There are three major market trends:
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Green jobs
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Jobs in social media
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Telecommuting
These all three major trends are based on bigger trends in society, such as more environmental issues, greater progress in technology, which affects the way we communicate.
To have clear picture of factors that affect the employment trends its better to view the major respected publications Wall Street Journal, The Economist, Advertising Age, and BusinessWeek .
Google Alerts – A great tool for trend watching
Automation is key to keep track of all information and it make easy add observation for you. Just set up Google Alerts with any term which is related to job you are searching for such as “accounting job outlook” or any other keyword. When you will set up that then all information drop itself into your inbox.
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A lot of opportunities are available after your graduation. No more studies and sleepless nights or preparing for term paper. Your practical life begins here, you are unemployed but with great potential to work. You can be hired by any company on your educational ground.

It’s easy to search a job, but very difficult to get one. Always keep in mind that you are not the only graduate in this year, there are thousands who have graduated this year. When applying for a great job, you are competing with hundreds of other applicants.
To get more chances of getting hired, here are some tips which you should consider before and during job hunting. Most of the fresh graduates don’t consider to review tips before they are into job hunting, but it is important for them to know about job search.
1 – Check & update your online profile
Most of people know about social networking sites even before going to college. They usually post pictures on these websites for sharing them with their friends. So before applying for any job, check your online profile and delete the pictures which can hinder you from being employed. Tell your friends also, so that you can completely clean your online profile.
2 – Proofread your resume
Write you resume with full attention and take time as much as you can for writing it. Because it’s not your final thesis which have the deadline. After writing it read twice or even thrice, ask you friend to read it again. A better resume is first step of success for being hired.
3 – Customize your resume for every company
Earlier, resumes were used as a simple source of data of the applicants. But now resumes are used as a tool for having more chances to be hired. Customize your resume according to the company’s philosophy and skills which they require. Because when you customize your resume to each company you are planning to work with, you are highlighting the skills and personality the companies are looking for from a candidate.
4 – Make online professional profile
When you clean up your online profile, build up a professional profile. Use your online network for searching job. For online job search use different websites and update your profile there. Companies which are looking for candidates will access your information online and will contact you if provided information is according to company’s needs.
5 – Be Professional
If you are young it doesn’t mean that you act casually during the job interviews. Though are young but now you are in professional world, so be professional in your approach and show your self as a respectable and responsible individual.
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An Interview is the first step where you can prove your abilities and skills before the employer. So, before you go for interview, be well prepared. Some of the basic job interview tips are mentioned below to help you on big day.
Get Ready: You need to prepare yourself from the very beginning. Learn about the organization and its working strategies. Prepare a brief description regarding your experiences and skills. Be ready to answer tough questions, practice yourself for an interview to gain confidence. You should know all about yourself so that you can answer any tricky question from the interviewer.
Appearance Counts: You should be well dressed and look neat before you go for an interview. Don’t take it easy, its a matter to get a job. Don’t chew gum,or eat something that leaves odor and don’t smoke.
Be Confident and Behave Well: When you reach the place, meet everyone humbly. The very important thing to do is reach in time and be punctual. Know your interviewer and behave well before him. Don’t get too free or too reserve. Avoid asking such questions whose answers are already provided online. Don’t ask question regarding salary or benefits rather be concerned about the position in the organization.
Say Thank you: When you are done with the interview, thank the interviewer and shake hands.
Required Information: Some basic documents are required regarding your personal information. Like resume, social security card, educational documents, references ( never place your family member’s reference) and transcripts.
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Your work place means to you a lot and obviously you don’t to mess in there. Different work places possess different environments, but it is observed that most of the workers have some or the other issue that disturbs their working performance a lot. So, it is necessary make your mind according to your work place atmosphere, and pay more attention towards your work than getting distracted because of nuisance.
A few tips are mentioned below, these are the common deeds one usually ignores and gets into problem. Try to stick with these tips so that you can work with peace of mind.
- Be A Great Listener: All speak up, nobody listens. Be the first to listen to others, this costs you nothing. Just pay attention and listen to your boss to what is he saying actually. The more attentively you listen, the more you understand the task and perform well.
- Be Confident: You should have believe in yourself. Stay firm at what you say and what you do. Your personality should be strong enough that other think twice before speaking to you or about you. The right is always strong so be confident about your activeness and performance.
- Stay Calm: Everybody always say something that is harsh and annoying, but all you need is to stay calm and don’t give reaction. The more you stay calm, they more you live in peace. Don’t get emotional at your work place. You are there to work, not to make family relations.
- Stay Away from Dirty Politics: A lot of employees are observed who are involved in backbiting and creating intolerable atmosphere for other workers. They try other workers to get involved with them but you don’t actually need to. Stay away from ditching activities and cruel statements.
- Work Hard: You should have passion to work, work hard at your work place and pay most attention to what you are doing. You don’t need to speak about yourself, your performance will explain it all to your bosses. It all depends how much effort yo drop in. Obviously, your work shall be counted excellent if you only do it with whole heart and mind.
These are the common tips one should always stick with. There is nothing difficult to do when you once make up your mind.
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With the passage of time, it is observed that jobs aren’t available much as it used to be. One common method to search a job is by going through job advertisements, but there are also some jobs that are available but are not advertised. This article will help you to find an unadvertised job, one that is suitable for you.

Few Ways to Get an Unadvertised Job:
Contacts: When you are searching for a job, use your contacts. You can tell about your skills and capabilities to your contacts and tell them the kind of job you are actually looking for. Your contacts may include your family, friends and co-workers. This method can be very useful as in so many contacts, there must be any of them who is aware of job availability which suits you and can help you in this regard.
Website: Some companies do not advertise their jobs in news papers or any other media. Instead they use their own websites for publishing jobs. If you search those sites, you can get a life time opportunity. For this purpose you should enhance your investigating capabilities.
Submit Your Resume: One of the basic methods is submitting your resume to different companies. First, you can make a list of all those companies where you are interested to work, and then you personally visit them to know if there is any vacancy for you. Even if they don’t have any job opportunity for you at that current moment, you should submit your resume there at once. This step can work in future whenever they think to hire new staff.
Professional Organization Help: You can get assistance from professional organization as well which work in job consultancy and provide information of various jobs in different companies. You should ask them frequently to let you know if there is any suitable job for you. Because professional organizations and consultancy companies are mostly in touch with other companies and are aware of their jobs policies.
Local Chamber of Commerce: Your local chamber of commerce can also become an easy way for you to get your dream job. Actually they are always updated about every detail of local companies. They are also pre informed if any new business or company is about to be introduce in your town. So they can also suggest you something really beneficial.
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While seeking for any job, one faces failures a lot of times. There are many reasons behind one’s failure. It depends on the conditions and one’s ability also. Most of the common reasons are widely discussed on internet. Here I am going to discuss the reasons which you are not familiar with. In simple, these reasons are not very much known by the job hunters.

Here are the expected reasons for not getting hired:
1 – Excessive Expectations
There is no doubt that everyone wants a perfect job. But some people are ‘ideal job oriented’ and can’t find job of their dreams. So in result they remain jobless. It is better to mold your expectation according to circumstances, so much of demands in job search, mainly leads you to a failure. So take a review of your wants and needs, what can be changed and what can’t be. Then take a better decision with new determination for searching a job.
2 – Search technique does not pay always
Don’t limit yourself in applying for job only by using the traditional methods like applying online, or only networking, or only using employment agencies, or approaching the companies that are hiring. That’s all good, but you must build your own connections to expand your PR to have a better job.
3 – More Use of word “I” in Cover Letter
Mainly people describe all their abilities in the cover letter. But best is that you focus on the potential which employer needs; that is what they want. Than write, how you can fill those needs with your abilities.
4 – Lack of patience
Good employers always tend to think at long term. Mainly candidates fail to demonstrate long term potential. Good employers are looking for the better candidates, and they want to know what you can do today and in future for them. That’s why in most interviews you are asked most common question “Where do you see yourself in next five years?”. This question is not an ordinary question; they really do want to know about it.
5 – Repeating Mistakes
Do you really take time to analyze yourself after interviews? Reason for being failed in many interviews is beyond your thoughts but it’s not same always. Review of your interviews can help you sort out the reason for being refused.
6 – Hesitation in Rehearsing
It’s necessary to rehearse the most common asked interview questions. Your hesitation for not rehearsing will make you sound canned. To be confident in answering rehearsal plays major role.
7 – Halting Job Search
Sometime it happens that you give interview for your dream job. After making interview, you stop the job search and start waiting for a call. Though it’s good to have a break in your life but never break the search for job, until you get hired.
For having a better job you have to be determined. Never let the opportunities pass by you. Keep head high for a fly.
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Whenever a graduate enters into any of the profession he wants to have a great career and success. But as they grow up and they gain experiences they try to bind some misconceptions about careers and jobs. Some of them creates mythical thought about their jobs and careers. Many believe, incorrectly so, that there is only one path to achieve career happiness or find “career nirvana”.
If you are unemployed, you will be getting lot of free advices form different person you interact with. A very little amount of these advices are based on reality. You can act upon these advices but keep in mind that majority of these advices comprises of Myths.
Your career success is not tied up with these myths. Rather you have to do something by you own. Don’t fall a victim of your own misconception. Rather try to explore these myths, might be that some of them work for you. Some of well understood myths about careers are as follows.
1. There is only one perfect career out there waiting for me.
This isn’t true. As there are different ways to spend one’s life. Every thing in the universe changes its state. So how can there be a one perfect career. By believing this you are cutting out your chance to progress in life.
2. Sticking with the same career for life will show commitment.
This concept is also false. This thing also shows that you are scared of learning new things.
3. I have to stick to what I studied in college to build a career.
This concept is also wrong. At the job you have to learn new thing to progress. And if you stick to the old concepts you are not making your career rather you are destroying it.
4. Skills learned through paid jobs can help me to advance in future.
This is not the right thought. You learn by your experiences either personal or professional. these experiences are the basis of your career development.
5. New training or education is only for young people and for full time students.
That is off course very wrong, because if you doesn’t learn new things how will you adjust yourself with changing environment of the company you are working with.
6. Work life balance is a myth.
No not at all. You doesn’t have to choose from one of them.Recognizing this now employers are setting flexible hours for employees.
7. I should be looking for a “safe” industry with job security.
If true what will you do if you are downsized during recession period. In recession period no job is safe and secure. So forget job security.
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Success in job search doesn’t happen or you say that it happens with miracles. You job search success entirely depends on you. Its only you who can make this happen. For a great job with job security and satisfaction, you have to make this happen. Come on, lets know how can this happen.
Sometimes it happens that you have been working with a very good organization. You are fully satisfied with it. Until the time comes and new management takes over. You are not comfortable with new management and as is the case of management. In this scenario you wait for you to resign the job or just you are fired.
There are many practical examples of this happening. What to do then is a bigger matter of importance and understanding. Here are some tips that can be your savior in this situation.
Set Your Goals
You can be successful in any situation when ever you tie your goals with it. For you to be successful in your job write down your goals and set down a time frame to reach these goal. But the thing is that these goals would be realistic. Be specific: state the job, title, and salary you are going after.
Learn what is effective
Don’t spend your time throwing your resume here and there. Remember your resume is your first impression. Keep it simple and yet concise. It should be short enough to be read with in no time but still will present full picture of you qualifications and what you are capable of doing of . Your resume must have ACTIONS=RESULTS statements to capture attention.
Know what you want
Whenever a job opportunity is advertised, a lot of unqualified people also apply for the job. So what want to know that what type of job do you want and are you capable of doing it. Analyze yourself and determine what accomplishments, strengths, and skills you possess and try to improve them.
Be prepared for the interview
Anticipate the questions that are likely to be asked from you. Write them down on a paper. Try to find out their answers. Next thing is that never answer any question more than 60 seconds.
Picture your success
You can never achieve success by envisioning a goal’s and writing down on paper but you have to do some thing to get to success. In order to achieve success you must have to find a way and then practically act upon it to reach there.
Technorati Tags: organization,management,salary,qualifications,skills
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